Dear Mr. Gates

Dear Mr. Gates,

Please accept this posting as my official request to have a week of my life back. I would either like the time fully returned to me or payment in lieu for IT services. I am an ICT professional so I expect proper rates to apply.

I'm sorry I don't have a detailed accounting of my time, but I have been fully engaged, for more than a week, with the sole goal of installing your Microsoft Windows XP computer operating system. In that time I have booted from my legitimately purchased Windows DVD perhaps 2 dozen times. This is not easy, since your software doesn't recognize my hard drive. Once inside your software, via the DVD I have selected the option of using the Recovery Panel a number of times. But the Recovery Panel looks an awful lot like the C:/ prompt. Staring at it doesn't ever fix the problem. I've loaded the actual operating system at least 8 times now, half as a repair to an existing installation and half starting with a disk format and reload from scratch. Thanks to these reloads I've loaded service packs one and two at least four times. And I've loaded service pack three once or twice.

The problem is the software. The basic OS works. SP1 seems to install and work. SP2 installs. But once it asks me to reboot at the end, it rarely returns.

Isn't it amusing when a software upgrade wipes out the files the OS needs to boot? Haha, very good, got me there.

If upgrading the software must destroy my system, then can you please stop presenting me with minute by minute reminders to download or install updates? Or even better, could you consider producing software that actually works? Based upon the amounts you owe me, for my time, and no doubt also everyone else, please sell your next software release for $1 and include a shiny new $100 bill in each box. Failing this, please compensate me for my time. Or failing this, please at least allow me to use my computer again. If there is a ransom you wish paid, I have not received the note.

Your humble slave in economics,
Morgan

What's Music Without Sound?

Nope, this isn't going to be deep. Just a little prayer of thanks. And since electronics were involved, what better way to pray then via the 'net?

Today wasn't a bad day. It wasn't particularly intense, but dense. Busy and constantly so. So when I got in from the office a few minutes early I felt no guilt about sitting for a moment and just enjoying the stereo. I picked a good song and decided to crank the volume.

It almost sounded good. But mostly it sounded, bad. My subwoofer wasn't working!

I would be an excellent writer if I could convey that moment of emotion when a bachelor thinks his stereo is broken. Alas, I can only tell you it was like heartbreak and pain and loss, with contempt and anger, and of course denial.

The Engineer inside awakes. " Huh? I thought we were done work. Wha? The stereo!?!"

Starting at the back end of the signal path, I checked the subwoofer. Checked its connection to the stereo. Checked the stereo. I checked the wires from the stereo that wrap 'round the room to the computer. Wiggle wiggle, check check.

There are three stereo-plugs from the receiver to the PC. I pulled the first one...

The front speakers died. I put the plug back. I pulled the second one...

The back speakers died. I put the plug back. I pulled the third one...

Nothing happened. It was the center-channel and subwoofer connection. The center-channel speaker wasn't in use and the sub wasn't booming, so no surprise so far. I put the plug back.

BOOM!

BOOM!

BOOM!

And my face had a smile on it.

I'm listening to the Beatles. Like I remember it with headphones, except this is my stereo simply with all the speakers working again. Life is good. One more problem solved.

They Really Are Spying On You

This is a public service announcement for all my brothers and sisters residing in the United States. The U.S. Department of Homeland Security is listening to your wireless computer traffic. Worse, they've asked your neighbour to do the work for them!

I wish I was making this up! Most of us are familiar with the Neighborhood Watch program. I think far fewer are aware of the Neighborhood Network Watch. The NNW is tasked with finding "terrorist activity" over local WiFi (wireless) computer networks. And as of March 8th, the NNW is asking citizens to join the Home Network Awareness Program (HNAP). In the words of the U.S. government:

"Participants in HNAP would collect sample network traffic from their own home networks as well as samples from networks within the vicinity. The Neighborhood Network Watch will be making a set of freely available instructions on how to capture network traffic, using the open source packet sniffer TCPDUMP, and how to log onto nearby wireless networks that maybe being operated by neighbors."

Instructions can be found here and here. Your neighbours may already be recording the information going across your home's wireless network. And this recorded information is then sent directly to the Data Analysis Division (DAD - aka Big Brother).

Having packet sniffing software in your possession is illegal in some countries. Using such software to record network traffic that isn't your own (such as to listen to your neighbour) is illegal in most places. But in the U.S., the government is encouraging volunteers to wander the streets with laptops, recording 30-60 minutes of network traffic which is then emailed to DAD.

Turn your encryption on! Place your wireless router away from walls and windows, close to the center of your home. And consider adjusting the transmit power levels of your WiFi router to the lowest levels that still work for you. Not to prevent terrorists from using your Internet connection... get real. This advice is to stop your government and their HNAP volunteers from recording your email and banking passwords, personal information, and all the rest.

Good luck.

I'm Not Here Right Now

I've had a truly interesting mix of high and low technology lately. I'm attending a training course in Atlanta, Georgia at the moment. So my days have been spent infront of a computer learning the deep and scarey workings of really complicated software. But due to a forgotten laptop power supply, my evenings have been computer free.

Not exactly the same as being "unplugged". But pretty darn close.

Just incase the juxtiposition between my days and evenings doesn't sound like much, I even threw in a day of hiking! I went to Stone Mountain, just outside of Decatur, GA.

I can't recall the last time I walked through a forest; before Sunday. It was soul building. Good friends, beautiful weather, climbing large rocks and hiking along narrow forest paths. Geveldig!

Alas, last night I found a new power supply at Office Max. So tonight I'm working. (Well, at the moment I'm procrastinating.) I have a lot to prepare for my next big work project. Thankfully I've got two positives pushing me along. Firstly, this training course has made the software, which it is my job to help sell, much simpler to use and understand. The second motivating factor is that in a week from Friday I'll be getting on a plane to pressent this work... in Sao Paulo, Brazil.

Yes, I think I travel too much. And yes I'm tired of the software. And yes I hate jetlag and twelve hour flights. But... Brazil! I just cannot complain about that!

Hard Drive Heaven

I don't think I've ever had a computer problem take this long for me to fix before, but I'm excited to say there's a new HDD in my media PC. I'm also really ashamed to admit I bought the disk on Sunday, and have ruined every night this week trying to get it to work. Ultimately I've discovered that my motherboard just wasn't compatible.

The computer is still in little bits all over the floor. Running, but still shamefully showing it's wires with bits and bytes dangling out. It had a memory upgrade, new hard drive, and on the way soon into a case near me is a replacement DVD burner also. Oh, and a new case. It's shaped to look just like a stereo receiver. It will sit just under the stereo receiver. And I'll smile from ear to ear when people ask where the computer is.

Five days to install a drive. Embarrassing. But it's formatting, all 700 beautiful gigabytes of it and that's good enough for now.